While the divorce process is troublesome, divorced parents are usually concerned about their children’s welfare. In order to protect their children from the trauma of divorce, many parents remain in unhappy marriages. This only creates a toxic cycle in which parents are not happy, family problems grow and the children, unfortunately, end up hurt anyways. As a result of divorce, many parents and children experience depression, anxiety or substance abuse, as well as difficulties balancing work and parenting responsibilities. These problems can impair a parent’s ability to provide stability and love to their children at times when they are most in need. There are steps parents can take to reduce the psychological impact of divorce on their children. The use of supportive parenting strategies can go a long way towards helping kids adjust to the changes caused by divorce.

Why is the first year after the divorce the hardest?

The first year or two after a divorce are when kids struggle the most, as you might expect. There is a likelihood that kids will be distressed, angry, anxious, and disbelieving. Usually, these reactions diminish or disappear by the second year. The majority of children do not experience these reactions on the long-term.

How do different ages react to divorce?

• Young children often find it difficult to comprehend why they must move between two homes. It is possible that they worry that one day, if their parents can’t love each other then they may not love them.

• Children in elementary school may think that they caused the divorce. It is possible they feel they misbehaved or they may assume they did something wrong.

• Teenagers may become quite angry about a divorce and the changes it brings. One parent may be blamed for the dissolution of the marriage, or one or both parents may be resentful of the upheaval in the family.

Of course, every child and situation are different. Many children react strongly about the divorce, others may take it better. It is important that you reach out to a professional before taking the decision of divorcing your spouse. This will give you and your family time to process and think on the consequences, giving you tools to deal with the different outcomes.